So I'm gonna do kind of a
different post today. I was looking around on the old "world
wide" and ran into some articles on what they call
"May-December" relationships. Ones like mine and Gabe's,
you dig? Like where one partner is way older than the other. And most
of them were downers. All negative stuff... I just can't dig it, man!
It totally made me sick to my stomach. So what I'm gonna do here is
make a list of all the bad stuff that people say about our kind of
relationships, and explain why it's bogus!
Lie #1 She's only in it for
Umm, yeah. If I'm only in it
for the bread then why do we drive a beat-up truck and live in a
tiny, drafty house? Gabe and I love our simple life. We both make
pretty much the same amount of moolah, and we split it between us.
Here's the skinny... we don't care. Rich cats man... all they care
about it themselves. Gotta look perfect, act perfect, get everything
perfect... nothing's ever good enough! Yeah our crib is small and the
furniture was someone else's first, but it's groovy cause it's OURS.
You dig? We chose the stuff, we put posters up and painted and made
it our little chunk of heaven. And the beat-up truck? It gets us
where we're cruising and we don't notice the rust when we're laying
in the bed watching the stars.
Lie #2 He just wants s*x.
This one's raunchy, but here's
the deal. Gabe and I are comfortable with each other... we shower
together, give each other massages, go around the house "natural",
but we've never jumped each others' bones or got laid or whatever
name you wanna put on it. It just isn't our bag, man. There's so much
more to a relationship then that. From the day we started going
around together, Gabe always said affection was the top word and I
was with him 100%. Holding hands, cuddles, backrubs, all that jazz.
We don't want kids, we just wanna adore each other and have our cozy
Lie #3 He wants a "trophy."
Okay, Gabe's looking over my
shoulder now and laughing at me. If you listen to him rap, you'd
think I was a goddess. Gee whiz! Anyways, yeah, don't anybody think
that I'm Gabe's "second;" I'm his first, and he's my first,
and we're both totally fine with that. He says to tell you beautiful
folks that he's not interesting in parading around a gorgeous chick
on his arm, he just wants pure lovin'.
Lie #4 We're afraid of
committing to each other.
We're together for life.
Period. We'd die without each other. Nope, not bein' over-dramatic...
just pure simple truth. We never really lived until we met each
Lie #5 He's boring/never
wants to go out/whatever.
We're both "in"
people. We don't party because we don't like parties. Curling up
together with a bag of popcorn, going for a stroll together, playing
music, taking turns reading a book to each other, enjoying a hot
bath, creating art together, even taking naps together... that's our
bag, you dig? Like we keep saying, pure and simple.
Lie #6 She's looking for a
father-figure to replace the one she never had.
Flake off man! I mean, I got no
complaints about my old man. Sure he's over religious and he don't
talk to me because he thinks I'm "shacked up", but he's
still my old man and I got no interest in replacing him. Besides,
Gabe sure ain't a father figure. I'll lay it to you straight, we joke
about me being his mother. Not that he's a ditz, just that I like
taking care of him. "You take your vitamins man?" "Lemme
grab you another soda." "You tired? You want a back rub?
You've been working too hard, sit down before you pass out." He
picks on me about it but I know he loves it. Sometimes it's nice to
not always be the one taking care of everything.
Lie #7 He's a pervert.
Go back and look at Lie #2
again will ya?
Lie #8 You don't think about
the consequences of the age gap.
We do. Believe me, we do. We
rap about it for hours sometimes. You've never really had your heart
broke until you've seen the guy you love more than life crying
because he won't always be there to take care of you. I try telling
him that that's not the case... I could die in a car accident or get
cancer or something and go first, you never know. He feels down
sometimes because he imagines himself rotting in a old folks' home
while I'm out living life... and my reply is always the same. "I'm
gonna bath ya, change your diapers, crawl up in the hospital bed with
ya when the nurses aren't looking, and I'm gonna sit in your lap and
you're gonna ride me around in your wheelchair and everyone's gonna
look at us and say, 'Gosh, they're sure in love!'"
Lie #8 you don't have the
same peer groups.
That one's easy man. We don't
have peer groups, period. I was always a loner who never fit in with
kids my own age cause I acted thirty years older, and he was the
awkward guy that was too shy to hang out with people. We have a few
buddies that we met through music festivals and stuff, but no one
close. We're everything to each other, off in our own little world.
Lie #9 He's probably done
this before with other girls.
Back off. I don't let anyone
walk over my man and accuse him of being a lying, cheating two timer.
You don't know him, you don't know me, you're not the one sharing
secrets about your lives at three in the morning at the kitchen
table. We know each other inside and out. I've never met anyone more
honest or faithful in my life.
Lie #10 It's not normal and
won't work out.
Climb it, Tarzan. We're out to
prove the world wrong.